He showed me porn when he was fixing my father’s computer. He was in high school. I was 4 or 5. He works at my grandfather’s house as a janitor. A few days later, i was with him in my grandfather’s backyard. He wanks himself of in front of me. When i was 7, he tried to kiss my lips. Thank God he always missed cause i always push him away. Six months ago, he showed up at my grandfather’s funeral. His mum calls my name and when i turned around, there he is. My smile dimmed. I don’t know what to do.
Can he go to jail for showing me porn when i was only four and jerking off in front of me when i was only 5? Can he go to jail for ruining my life? Is that not enough for someone to be punished?
If somebody ask for evidence, the would have to invent a machine that can interpret memories. I was 5, how the fuck should i know that it was a harassment and inappropriate?
There’s so much anger in me that i couldn’t help but ignore him. There was a lot of people at that time, maybe that’s why. I wish i was strong enough to spit on his face when i had the chance. I wish i was strong enough to yell or confront him about it. He jerked off in front of me, he showed me porn when i was only 4 or 5. Did that affected my youth? Maybe, i couldn’t even analyze my own problems. I wish i could slap him. I hope that his future daughter won’t receive his karma. I hope he remembers what he did to me, because it’s engraved in my mind. I wish i could…